acceptance.

i'm stubborn, i'm sensitive, i'm gullible, and i know it. but i'm not too stubborn, not too sensitive, not too gullible, and do you want to know why? because i love myself. i know who i am and i'm okay with it, which makes everything i do the perfect amount of stubbornness, the perfect amount of sensitivity, and the perfect amount of gullibility. i am who i am and i'm okay with that. i'm not going to change now, and am most likely not going to change in the future. i will not change for you, or you, or you. not for anyone. please stop calling me a slut, a ho, a lesbian, and telling me i have a huge vagina. at first it was funny, and now it's just annoying. that's not me. and i don't appreciate your jokes anymore.

i won't do drumline if you're in it next season. maybe i'll move out to california, do a line there. i don't know if i can handle this again. maybe i'm just overreacting, but i in no way want to get to know you. i in no way want to perform with you. i in no way want to be on any line with you.

i know it shouldn't be about the people, but about the playing. it's hard to focus on playing when there are so many people you don't like or who make fun of you. it's not funny anymore, at least not to me.

and that's all that counts.

i want to feel happy again.